Just Me

A good friend recently taught me that our worth as human beings is based simply on who we are, not on what we do. It relates perfectly to this quote from the LDS Women's Broadcast:

"Our divine nature has nothing to do with our personal accomplishments, the status we achieve, the number of marathons we run, or our popularity and self-esteem. Our divine nature comes from God. It was established in an existence that preceded our birth and will continue on into eternity." - Rosemary M. Wixom

This quote is so profound to me, and it's a lesson I've been forced to learn recently. 

This summer I spent a lot of time at home. Usually when I go home everyone asks me what my next adventure is going to be. Because since high school I've answered:

- "I'm going to BYU"

- "I'm teaching English in China"

- "I'm going on a mission"

- "I'm working as an EFY counselor"

- "I'm doing Public Affairs in LA"

- "I'm studying Arabic in Jordan"

But this summer was different. I had no answer. I had no idea what my next adventure would be. And that was really really hard. But there I was, just me. Hanging out at home. Babysitting babies. Going on long walks by myself. Spending my nights cheering for a sister's volleyball team or sewing a sweater with a friend. No plans. No idea what to do next. 

And surprisingly, that was okay. That was enough.

Because who I am is not defined by what I do. If I take away all the accomplishments and hobbies and titles and adventures, I am just me - quiet but confident, kind, completely self-motivated, independent and stubborn, very private but probably too honest, sometimes obnoxiously silly and weird, other times analytical and contemplative, soft-spoken but opinionated, faith-filled and sincerely spiritual. That's me. A daughter of a glorious Heavenly Father who just wants to be good and do good. 

And that is enough. 

The Master Plan

One thing I know is that God has a plan. 

He has shown me in my life and in the lives of others. 

I usually don't understand this concept until I look back on events in my life in amazement at how everything fits into place, but it's hard to see that when things aren't going according to plan.

And right now things are definitely not going according to my plan.  

So today I needed the reminder that God does, in fact, have a plan. And one of the many ways that I know that is because of a story I told a million times as a missionary in upstate New York, it's the story of the Smith family whose son would become the first prophet of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints...

Joseph Sr. and his family of 10 were living on a farm in Sharon, Vermont when they experienced 2 years of crop failure. In 1816 the family decided that they would try one more time. That year there was a snow storm in June and frost occurred every month of the year, destroying all the family's livelihood. After these three difficult years, Joseph Sr. finally decided that they needed to move. 

He heard about the fertile, cheap land of Western New York and moved to the town of Palmyra in search of a better future. His family soon joined him and everyone worked together to save enough money and eventually purchased  100 acres of land just south of Palmyra. While there the family established a master plan - they would first build a log home and begin clearing land to farm. They would tap the maple trees for sugar production and each of the sons would purchase adjoining land and build homes of their own. 

But the Lord had a very different master plan for this family. 

This land would eventually become the cradle of the Restoration, located just three miles from the hill where gold plates lay deposited by ancient prophets, waiting to come forth as The Book of Mormon. 

Now think of this - I can just imagine that poor, young father in Vermont, praying for good crops so that he would be able to provide for his large family. I'm sure those were long days of stress and worry and fear. But because of those trials - those three years of crop failure - this family moved exactly where God needed them to be. God knew exactly where the gold plates were hidden. He knew the faith of one of the young boys, Joseph Jr. He knew that this family would have the strength and humility to restore His church to the earth. 
He knew. 

Now I'm hoping that I don't have to wait three years for answers to my prayers. But because of this story and so many experiences, I know that God has a plan for my life. He sees the big picture. He knows. 

Special Olympics

World Special Olympics in LA, in need of Arabic speakers, WHY NOT? 

Another item to add to Alyssa's list of random life experiences? SURE.

I was the Delegation Liaison for Jordan, meaning the translator, tour guide, cheerleader, organizer, chauffeur, entertainer, errand-runner, miracle-worker, ect... 
I was with them the entire 2 weeks they were in LA, and here's what that entailed:

When the team first arrived we went to our host-town of Bakersfield for a few days before competition started. While there we were treated so well - the city organized activities and meals to welcome Team Jordan to the U.S. 

We went bowling...

And to the zoo...

Bakersfield was awesome. The people were so nice and helpful and the Jordanians LOVED it. So many people volunteered to make it a great experience. We had police escorts everywhere we went, and one of my favorite moments was when one of the officers gave his watch to special athlete Abdullah. He freaked out and it was adorable. 

When we got to Los Angeles we checked in to the athlete village at USC. That weekend was the Opening Ceremony and it was AMAZING. I have always dreamed of walking in the parade of athletes at the Olympics. Ya, this was Special Olympics, and ya, I wasn't an athlete, but I got to be in the parade! And it was SO fun!

ESPN covered the ceremony and acts included: Cassadee Pope, Avril Lavigne, Stevie Wonder, Eva Longoria, Michelle Obama, Michael Phelps, and other people I can't remember...

It was a really inspiring show and the end turned into a huge dance party!

The rest of the time in LA was competition. My athletes competed in track & field, bocce ball, and roller skating. I would bounce around between the different events, help the coaches figure things out and cheer for the athletes.

Let's be honest, I really wanted to play too...

They KILLED it. Check out these medals...

After competitions we would try to do fun stuff. One evening I went to Venice Beach with one of the coaches, Muhammad.

Another day I took some of our team and the Qatar team to Hollywood. 

They thoroughly enjoyed dancing along to street performers :)

But most nights I would just sit outside and chat with the coaches from Jordan, Qatar, and Iraq. I loved them all and we had some really great conversations. They asked a lot about the Mormon Church and why I live the way I do.

My favorite part was just hanging out with the athletes and helping them feel special and loved. They were so sweet and fun to be around, and really good at their sports!

Notice I wore a huge orange polo every single day? Yeah it's hott, I know. 

Special Olympics was an incredible experience and I loved being with the Jordanian team. I'm amazed at how much planning, volunteering, and sponsoring goes into these kinds of events. People are good and want to make a difference in others' lives. I have so much respect for those with intellectual disabilities and all those who love, support, and encourage them. It matters.

Oh and I was featured on Mormon Newsroom and Church News if you wanna read it!

100 Things I Learned on My Mission

For some reason I've been thinking a lot about my mission lately. 

Perhaps it's because I've been teaching with the missionaries serving in our area. Maybe it's because my sister recently returned from her mission and my brother is preparing to go. Or possibly it's because I miss the sense of purpose and fulfillment I felt as a missionary and how happy and confident I was despite the challenging circumstances. 

Whatever the reason, I was reading through my journal and found a list I wrote during the last couple weeks of my mission titled "100 Things I Learned on My Mission." This is from February 2013 while serving in my last area of Canandaigua, NY...

100 Things I Learned on My Mission:

1. Nothing is coincidence - God is the architect of every moment, experience, and relationship
2. God always knows better than I do
3. We learn through trials
4. Ours is a God of miracles
5. God is kind
6. True joy comes from obedience
7. The Lord gives me trials because He loves me
8. The worth of every soul is great
9. The price you pay to become acquainted with God is worth it
10. When you love people, you can never be too bold
11. God always keeps His promises
12. I need Jesus Christ
13. I can do anything if it's the Lord that wants me to
14. Everyone is needed in God's plan
15. The Lord honors and cares about our desires
16. Attitude is everything
17. Life is meant to be enjoyed
18. The Lord purposefully gives us weaknesses so that we'll turn to Him
19. All people are entitled to receive revelation
20. I choose my life

21. Repentance is beautiful, and I need it every day
22. Leave judgement to the Lord
23. The Lord loves His missionaries
24. Inside, everyone knows what is right and wrong
25. Wickedness never was happiness
26. People can and do change
27. The Plan of Salvation is real
28. I'm nobody and can do nothing on my own
29. Happiness is a choice
30. Faith is only given when something is true
31. Praying for others does make a difference
32. Where much is given, much is required
33. Heaven is only heaven for the heavenly
34. Bad days come to an end
35. The gospel is both simple and deep
36. God is the source of all truth
37. Great blessings come from trials to more than compensate for any cost
38. Help is only a prayer away
39. Conversion takes a lot of work
40. Nothing can provide more happiness than a testimony of the truth

41. I don't just believe the gospel, I know it
42. The Lord uses a different time table than we do
43. The Lord trusts me 
44. One person can make a difference
45. People are prepared to receive the truth
46. I can never be content
47. God hates to see His children suffer
48. The Priesthood is the actual power and authority of God
49. Thank goodness for unanswered prayers
50. Gratitude is the best remedy for a bad day
51. There are a lot of good people in the world
52. What an honor it is to be called a Mormon
53. The First Vision really did happen
54. The Spirit will never lie
55. Missionary work is more than being an example, it's inviting people to act
56. There is a lot to look forward to
57. It's okay to have questions and not know everything
58. People won't change until they're invited to
59. The gospel is for everyone
60. Ordinances of the gospel are not optional for salvation

61. The veil is very thin
62. The genius of the Church is creating spiritual experiences for individuals
63. Agency is eternal
64. Fullness of joy is found in the family
65. Everything in the gospel connects
66. When you pray with the Spirit your prayers are answered
67. The cleanliness of a home relates to the Spirit in the home
68. You have to be with Christ to invite others to come
69. You can never fail when you have charity
70. All good things come from God
71. I am never alone
72. Life is so precious
73. God always validates His servants
74. Scriptures and prayer are essential to survive
75. The Lord is loyal to those who are loyal to Him
76. The world is being prepared for the Second Coming of Jesus Christ
77. "Any opportunity to serve the Lord is high and holy honor"
78. When we do our best, the Lord will make up the difference
79. The Book of Mormon was written for me
80. We live in a world of sorrow but there is so much to rejoice about

81. One spiritual experience is not enough
82. Our prophets really are prophets of God
83. When we obey, the Lord is bound
84. Fasting really does make a difference
85. It is such a privilege to have the gift of the Holy Ghost
86. I can give the Lord cause to be happy, He can rejoice in my faith
87. Acquiring knowledge is essential for salvation
88. When you put God first, everything else falls into place
89. God speaks to ME
90. The whole purpose of the gospel is to cleanse us from sin
91. Any negative thought or feeling does not come from God
92. Satan is real and wants to make us miserable
93. No effort is wasted
94. Salvation was never easy
95. Don't be afraid to shine your superior light for all the world to see
96. You get what you look for
97. The God of Heaven cares
98. Everything begins with thoughts
99. The sealing power is real
100. I will forever be a missionary for the Lord Jesus Christ

So I was kind of surprised when I re-read this list recently. Experiences that sparked this list flooded my mind as I remembered how specifically I've learned each lesson. And it's funny how we have to keep relearning things. However, I am grateful to be able to look to the past to face the future and remember God's goodness and tender mercies as I face the decisions and challenges of each new day. Sometimes our old selves are the best reminder of who we are and where we're going. 

Questions? Visit mormon.org